Back from their Southern California road trip, in which a man supposedly suffering from seizures drives an RV cross country, the Brownklownz return to the filming location and return to their old bullshit ways.
Let’s jump right in. First off, AcidRain and Wolverine think that Browntown is complete and that there is no more work to be done. With that said, they do the only logical remaining chore and that is to create barely legible wood-burned signs pointing out all of the shacks and shotboxes that litter this once pristine land.
DuhVinciNoah and Birdbrain aren’t much better. They decide to contribute bells to Browntown. What happened to their wolf-calls? Please tell me that wasn’t just bullshit too?
Birdbrain decides to challenge DuhVinciNoah’s skillz with ancient weapons and starts beating him with short pieces of PVC pipe. His only defense is to just say, “Stop… Stop it! I mean it… I’m telling mom!”
Now cut to poor ExtremeBore. After the ParkSlop construction crew finished his tree house, he decides to slap on a red car door to act as the main entrance to his bachelor pad. Wolverine helps him install it, during that time they talk about how girls will think his tree house is cool because it has a car door. Wolverine sounds sad when he realizes everyone else has a shitshack but he has to live in the main house with his useless, selfish chud parents.
Next, the narrator tries to explain once again how falsely receiving PFD funds is not their fault, and that BullshitBilly and Bum did the noble thing and decided to plea themselves guilty so the rest of the Brownklownz wouldn’t have to go to prison. Personally, I was looking forward to that spin off show.
Since you can’t seem to go more than two episodes without a Skaflestad appearing on camera, the Mayor shows up on a scripted whim and pays his good friend, BullshitBilly, a visit. You know what they say about the company you keep.
BullshitBilly tells us his name is Kenny Karl (I think that’s his middle name). I wonder why they decided to stop calling him Skaflestad? According to the city website, it’s the same mayor that’s been there since this shitshow started. He tells BullshitBilly that he can just look around and see that he isn’t afraid of a little work. Obviously he hasn’t seen this show when BullshitBilly falls into a coma or injurs himself and misses all of the work being done.
Kenny “Can I please be on TV” Skaflestad tells BullshitBilly that despite him being a convicted liar and cheater, he still supports him.
Oh, and wouldn’t you know it, Kenny has a job for them! They need to clean a bunch of shit off the beach. He obviously didn’t pay a lot of attention to the condition of Browntown to see what the Brownklownz consider ‘clean’.
Next, AcidRain and Birdbrain graze like cattle on the weeds that surround Browntown.
But wait… Oh No’s! What’s this? With the threat of upcoming work, BullshitBilly has injured something that we never see happen. Some of the family, even SpotlessAmi, seem a little perturbed at the fact that this ‘bush’ veteran will once again be sitting on his ass for weeks on end.
Of course the Brownklownz ham it up, with ParkSlop willingly encouraging them, creating a ‘bush’ cast and brace with sticks, a t-shirt, and some moss. You would think in the bush you might have a basic first aid kit? Plus, in this entire scene DuhVinciNoah is missing! He’s nowhere to be found in a lot of this episode when the rest of the family is all together. What the hell is he doing that’s so important? Oh right, he’s working on earth shattering, life changing experiments involving spiders, moss, and bells.
BullshitBilly says he doesn’t want to go to another doctor… unless he can get a prescription of sympathy to lighten his upcoming jail sentence. BullshitBilly also tells that unlike other times, he decided to go to the doctor this one time. Don’t these idiots keep track of their own bullshit? Every other episode features a Brownklown needing medical attention but this most recent knee injury is the ‘one time’ he decides to go to the doctor? What about last week’s episode dedicated to your seizures? And what ever happened with those visits? Did they find a cause or a cure? Probably not because they are all psycho-sematic brought on by the threat of work or Munchhausen’s.
Once on the SS Grifter and heading to the doctor, BullshitBilly tells his chuds that as much as it hurts him, he’s going to have to miss the upcoming salvage job. Oh you could just see the disappointment and sadness in his eyes as he once again has to disappoint his children… Something I’m sure they’re all very used to.
He tells Wolverine that he is going to put Birdbrain in charge of the salvage job. Is it just me or is Birdbrain looking a little worse for wear? I’m starting to think that she isn’t really their daughter, she’s really Joey Ramone in Witness Protection. Maybe the band will get back together?
After dumping off their dad, the Brownklown kidz arrive to meet Mayor Kenny ‘Karl’ on the beach. He explains to them that the sunken pier can be used as a ‘barge’ to haul off the rest of the garbage on the beach.
A few seconds after work begins, they become distracted when Wolverine finds a shed that he would like to use as a home in Browntown, despite the fact the land is only on lease from the real land owner and will never be ‘Browntown’ except for when filming their ‘reality’ show.
BullshitBilly and SpotlessAmi return to the filming location after his doctor’s appointment. Back on the beach, the rest of the Brownklownz… Wait! Where’s DuhVinciNoah? He didn’t go with his parents, he isn’t on the jobsite with his other slurred-speech siblings. Could he be taking after BullshitBilly and missing work because of an ‘injury’?
The kidz continue to clean out Wolverine’s future home while completely ignoring the job they were hired to do which was remove all the OTHER garbage on the beach. But, their needs and desires come first, the cleanup that will benefit others can obviously wait.
Back in Browntown, BullshitBiilly and SpotlessAmi sit on their assess lamenting the fact that the bush has changed. SpotlesAmi crochets something useless while BullshitBilly cleans the magic revolver from 2 episodes ago. I wonder if it will turn into a semi-auto while he’s cleaning it?
SpotlessAmi dispenses more dime-store wisdom, making it hard for BullshitBilly to not load the revolver and put himself out of his misery.
Back at the beach, the kidz employ a series of small jacks and lifts in an attempt to raise it enough to slip the old sunken dock under it when the tide comes in, thus using the dock as a sort of barge to haul it back to the filming location. Before the commercial break, the shack is barely supported and incredibly unstable, which causes it to move off-kilter while being raised.
Some of the Brownklown kidz start to think it’s a lost cause, but after some debate, they take a vote and decide that they should finish what they started… When it comes to TAKING the cabin they want, NOT cleaning the beach like they said they would.
Back in Browntown, BullshitBilly gimps around the woods and finds out what useless DuhVinciNoah is doing. He decides he’s going to build a “hydrogen tank-uh” (no shit, he pronounces it ‘tank-uh’… cuz y’know, he’s a genius) to power a tiny gas burner. He hopes he doesn’t burn himself but if he did he thinks it would be cool as long as it burns his good side. He explains how the oxygen creates the hydrogen and it will do something resembling nothing. It fails miserably (as usual) and we never see it working. Once again, time well spent there, Genius.
The next day on the beach, the kidz manage to get the house on the makeshift barge. After the commercial break, the short segment treats us to Wolverine auditioning for the Hoonah High School Cheer Squad.
The closing scene is drawn out like watching the tide rise… Literally. Eventually Wolverine’s future home floats and is strapped to the back of the SS Grifter.
On the way back, Bum is sad because his dad sold him out and has to go to jail soon. He claims he’s working through the five stages of bush grief.
Once on shore, BullshitBilly tells them how proud he is that he raised a bunch of uneducated, dependent children that unquestionably provide for him. He drones on about how bush they are and blah blah blah.
In the previews for the next episode, the kidz try and move a bunch of tires for some reason, and gunshots are heard in the distance. The Brownklownz act like they need to protect their filming location home, which is actually filmed on land leased for the show. But hey, gotta end the season on a cliff-hanger… No matter how phony.