Why Do The Brown’s Need A Boat Captain?

wreck-it-gabe Alaskan Bush People

s4e11-14As part of my episode recap last week, I included a screen shot of the end credits in which they list a “Boat Captain.”

My question was, “Why do they need a boat captain? Isn’t BullshitBilly a 30-year seasoned veteran of the high seas?”

Well, after watching two seasons of him sink boats and ram them into docks on numerous occasions, it’s apparent that captain Hazelwood would do a better job steering a boat than our favorite TV grifter.

After some cursory research, I believe I have found more information on this captain. I’m not presenting this as solid fact, I’m just sharing what I found. Coincidence? Maybe… You decide.

First, the name appears in a Milwaukee newspaper that tells of a fishing boat captain that lives on the Great Lakes but is moving to Alaska in 2011. Looking at the picture of him you can see how much he looks like BullshitBilly. Maybe that’s why ParkSlop hired him to be the captain because in dim light or far-away shots, he’d pass for him.

He next appears on another Alaska TV show called Alaska Fish Wars. He played himself as this was another ‘reality’ show produced for NatGeo.

I also found that the Misty Bay Lodge, Where the Brownklownz REALLY live, is owned by one of the Producers of the show according to this post on their Facebook page. In this post it seems he is saying that Captain Dan Anderson is a producer of the show, but I was unable to find anything on that. Perhaps he’s referring to the upcoming season?


Someone commented on the fact that maybe he is the one that takes the crew out on the skiff for filming. That would seem like a hell of an overqualified captain to just ferry around a few ParkSlop personnel. My bet is that he is the one driving the SS Grifter as it pulls in and out of various ports and harbors since none of the Brownklownz are able to do it without severely damaging property.

credits2I reviewed the end credits and did not see Dan’s name credited for anything other than “Boat Captain.”

In looking back at the end credits, I noticed something else weird but unrelated to this post. It seems Browntown is in a National Forest?




6 thoughts on “Why Do The Brown’s Need A Boat Captain?

  1. What? Oh dear Lord! Are you kidding me? I never saw these credits. A captain? Like you said, “for what?”. With more and more press coming out about these people, do they really think they can air a season 5 with the same malarkey they have been feeding us for 4 seasons? With the trips on the big metal bird flying through the air to go to Hawaii, a few weeks in TX with all those strip malls, time in Califirnia, etc etc. Videos dating back to about 2008-09 with Alaska Wilderness Family videos for OutdoorTV, etc. Do they think they can still sell this “shock and awe” of society?

    Do you have a pic of this captain?

    Thanks for your recaps, I always enjoy them.

  2. The fraudsters at Discovery keep re-splicing old tapes (Oddly enough, discovery calls them the lost tapes/episodes, but if they were lost, Discovery could not show them.) I expect Discovery to do this for the rest of our simmer. And why not? people are still watching, including me.

    1. The show “lost episodes” because they done have to pay the browns for these shows.The browns only get payed for the shows that are played during the season.Looks like Billy the con man is getting coned by Park Slope!lol!

  3. You’re actually wrong, in this case. Dan is, in fact, responsible for the Discovery Crew, though he does sometimes steer the Integrity when there is some sort of emergency.

    Regardless of Billy’s various lies & transgressions, he can captain a boat, and he did spend a good majority of his life living on boats.

    I would also add that, yes, there is fakery on this show, but Billy’s health is not one of the falsehoods. He is sick, and he does actually injure himself regularly.

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