Alaskan Bush People Spend Harsh Alaskan Winter In… Phoenix?

Alaskan Bush People don't live in Browntown

Well, part of it at least. I know fans of this shitshow will lecture me about how their favorite lovable band of phony ‘bush’ people deserve a vacation now and then and enjoy their new found minimalist success, but let’s point out something about their ‘vacation’: They have been away from the ‘bush’ for more than just a vacation. Season after season you see proof that these phonies spend the harsh Alaskan winter, which they spend all TV season preparing for, in more hospitable climates. This year it’s been amazingly in-your-face just how full of shit this show is. All … Continue reading

NCIS Los Angeles – An Incredibly Bad TV Show

This show is a spin-off of an only slightly more watchable show, NCIS. The people responsible for this piss-dribble seem to have taken what little believability and credibility the original show had and made, as incredible as it sounds, an even worse television show! How does this show suck? Let me count the ways… Wait, I don’t have a strong enough processor for that. Let’s just list some of the most notably insulting stupidity. First off is their appearance. This not only goes for their office, which looks like it moonlights as a surf shop, but their personal appearance as well. Get this… These … Continue reading

Scorpion – An Unbelievably Bad TV Show

Let me be blunt. I am not a fan of this show. It personally ranks among the worst TV shows currently on the air… And that’s saying a lot. There are plenty of contenders out there, but this one is such an insult to our collective intelligence you just want to walk up to everyone responsible and give them a swift kick in the crotch. Despite abysmal acting, completely unrealistic plots, and more ‘hacking’ than Hillary’s email servers, the fact it’s based on an apparent bullshit backstory makes it even more reprehensible. Let’s start with the show’s creator who, by … Continue reading

Alaskan Bush People Episode Recap S06:E08 Wind And A Prayer

Alaskan Bush People raising the wind turbine

Well, here we are. The latest season of the shitshow known as Alaskan Bullshit People has come to an end. This season set the bar pretty high when it comes to bullshit, so if there is a next season they’re really going to have outdo the lies and untruths in order to break this season’s record. On to the review. First, Mutt shows us how to establish dominance over a bear. It seems to just involve walking around their general vicinity with a gun. Mutt waves at the bear in an attempt to show his dominance. This season’s main piece … Continue reading

Alaskan Bush People Episode Recap S06:E07 Field Of Dreams

In the opening sequence, BirdBrain walks over to see Mutt and the massive amount of meat he supposedly has in his bullshit meat locker. We never see inside, but magically he pulls out exactly what BirdBrain wanted, some ribs… with sugar. Since we never see the inside I think that scene may have been altered a little. Next, Wolverine, BirdBrain, and AcidRain act like they give two shits about the rented cow they have to take care of during the time of it’s lease. They decide to see which one Sabrina likes best by going to alternate corners and calling … Continue reading

Alaskan Bush People Episode Recap S06:E06 All Falls Down

Oh boy, another shit-tastic episode of Alaskan Bullshit People! I can’t wait to see what lethal weapon ExtremeBore aims at his face this week. I’m going to apologize in advance if this recap gets a little “Rated R for strong language.” I think it comes from watching two episodes three days apart. I can’t fucking believe the bullshit that opens the show. Here we see Mutt and Wolverine stuffing bacon into shotgun shells! What? He claims they just want to scare the bears when they shoot at them. Why not just shoot in the air? Christ, the ek-shtreem stupidity of … Continue reading

Alaskan Bush People Epsiode Recap S06:E05 One Brown Down

Bird Brown puts sugar on eggs

Well, here we are. Another week another bullshit packed episode of Alaskan Bullshit People. Same as last week. This episode was so boring and uneventful so there’s not much to riff on. Let’s dive right in. In the opening scene, Mutt shows how he makes coffee on a boat. Cuz… Y’know, he’s a seasoned fisherman. I suspect that’s not coffee he was wanting. When we left off last week, we saw the SS Grifter was out in ‘open ocean’ facing mildly inclement weather. The chuds are barfin’, Scami is bithin’, and BullshitBilly is Bullshittin’. Let’s recap the bullshit so far. … Continue reading

Alaskan Bush People Episode Recap S06:E04 Dead In the Water

Well, it’s that time again. Time for you to put on your helmet and board the short-bus to Browntown! Just a quick note… this will probably be a short recap as there wasn’t a damn thing interesting or remotely viewable that happened this episode. The test pattern TV stations show right before signing off for the day was more interesting than this episode. But, let’s give it a try. The episode starts with Wolverine, AcidRain, and BirdBrain picking blueberries. Wolverine wishes he was an inchworm. Don’t set the bar too high there, buddy. I guess with their non-education, an inchworm … Continue reading

Alaskan Bush People Episode Recap S06:E03 Browntown Boom

Alaskan Bush People Matt builds a still

In the opening segment we see ExtremeBore trying to catch a chicken that he and AcidRain let out of the pen. Isn’t DuhVinciNoah living in the henhouse? I’m sure him and Rhain Carrot-Top Alicia will have a wonderful home amongst the chicken shit. Next, we see ExtremeBore again. He decides to cover the benches in a non-porous material because he’s tired of seeing the family sit on the flat, wet logs. So, he wants to solve the problem of watery seats by putting something on them that doesn’t absorb water? GENIUS! He hopes his mommy won’t find out that he … Continue reading

Noah Brown and Girlfriend Rhain Alicia In Vegas

With all of the Brownklownz spending their ill-gotten gains in Las Vegas, it was only a matter of time before pics of Noah and Ruth Rhain Alicia / Merrill were spotted online. Here’s the two of them doing something no one should care about except to incessantly mock the ongoing bullshit of their lives compared to that portrayed in their TV show, Alaskan Bush People. Life sure is different for the Brownklownz as opposed tho ones found in Billy Brown’s books “One Wave At A Time” and “The Lost Years.” With all of the Las Vegas sightings I have to ask, … Continue reading

Alaskan Bush People Episode Recap S06:E02 Bear With Us

Ami Brown talks about meeting Billy

Another week, another diaper load of crap from ParkSlop and Discoverup! The episode starts with Mutt showing us a well known bush delicacy, a mushroom that tastes just like chicken… Except it tastes nothing like chicken. In fact it’s so rancid he spits it out. Not even 30 seconds into this shitshow and already it’s full of useless non-bush knowledge. I’m learning so little! Next we see ExtremeBore and BirdBrain guarding their rented cow from a bear. I guess the Security People listed in the credits had the night off? The narrator retells how this bush family lived off the … Continue reading

ABP Episode Recap S06:E01 All That Matters

Alaskan Bush People like Gilligan's Island

We’re back! Another season of Alaskan Bullshit People is here which means that another season of Railing Kill’s episode recaps are on tap. Let’s dive right in shall we? The episode, and this season, start right off with the bullshit. The narrator tells us that the family has in fact been living in the bush for the last thirty-plus years. Do we have to review the evidence to the contrary? They make a veiled attempt to ‘come clean’ in stating that this year is the year the family REALLY commits to the bush, as opposed to half-assing it for 2 … Continue reading